“I’m Not Alone, I’m Just On My Own”

Being alone sucks big time sometimes. I know, it was actually my choice to pull myself away from people. But, do you know why? Somehow I just never fit in. There was a moment in my life, when everyone I know seem too busy living their life. They seem to have so little time for themselves, let alone bother to spend some time with me.
I always told myself to snap out of it and quit being such a melodramatic. And so, I just stop trying. Each rejection and every ‘no, I’m sorry, I can’t', felt harder each time. Because when no one else is there or willing to be there (whichever sucks just the same), I could only rely on me and pick myself all together, on my own.
I was creating this wall, so high and so thick, so no one could hurt me. I don’t need wanting people. I made it pretty clear that I don’t want anyone to step closer. But then, I decided to change direction. That’s why, it’s now coming back to me again.
I just need a while to adjust to these changes and respond better to all the same old same old shit.

The good news is nothing lasts. This too shall pass.